An honest blog
Well, it was a good weekend, as far as fun & excitement go! Saturday was spent with family & friends, and going to the home opener game for the Blazers - (who WON in a thrilling 4th quarter comeback!) - and Sunday was lay around the house, get laundry & chores done kinda day, which was perfect since the weather outside was frightful!
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However, I did NOT stick to my diet plan this weekend. I let the bad weather discourage me from getting outside and going for runs. DF & I did walk to the store & back on Sunday morning (about 1.5 mi roundtrip), so there was a *little* exercise in there, but not what I had planned.
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I’ve realized looking back on some of my past blogs that even when I’m accountable and come on here and admit my slip-ups, sometimes I’m not exactly honest about my feelings about them. I think I whitewash things a bit because I want to be positive and I think that it what will get me back on track (which is true, I suppose), but I’m wondering if ignoring the negative emotions inside is really a good thing or not. So I’ll try to be more honest in these blogs about how my ups & downs really impact me. It might not be the most uplifiting or entertaining read all the time, but at least when I go back to look at how I’m doing, I’ll see the true picture.
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As for the slip-ups this weekend, they really put me in a foul mood. It didn’t help that I’m pre-TOM right now and probably a few pounds ‘overstated’ on my true weight, but when I stepped on the scale Sunday and saw 140 I had a minor freak out. I’ve been so solidly in the 130’s for so long after all my hard work….it was just depressing. I know I have to acknowledge that it’s my own actions and failures to follow through on things like exercising this weekend that got me here, but that didn’t make it any easier to face. It’s difficult to realize that after I had such a positive summer with SO much exercise, SO much motivation, and SO much progress, that I’ve let myself slip back to this point and now I have to RE-do all that hard work just to get back to where I was only two months ago.
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But it has to be done. I want to feel the way I felt this summer again, not the way I feel now! I’m using the Sparkpeople site more regularly again (that really worked for me this summer), but I’m not as enthusiastic about it as I was. Hopefully I’ll get “sparked” by motivation again and be on my way to success. It did give me an idea to set a new “fast break” goal, which is a small goal that you go after for 14 days in a row - the idea being if you can accomplish this it will re-build your confidence and help you power on through. My goal is to get at least 2 servings of veggies each day for the next 14 days. I’ll add that to my accountability reports here!
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I don’t want anyone to think that I’m going to turn into a negative Nancy here and never celebrate the good things anymore, but that’s not it. I just think I need to be more open about acknowledging the bad things and how I feel about them so that I can see them in context and compare them to the goods.
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In GOOD news - I got myself out of bed this morning at 5am and did 30 minutes on the treadmill! AND, I’m 100% on plan for today. Small successes, but I’ll take them!
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Wow Kari, I’m proud of you for so many things.? First and foremost for being honest with YOU.? If you want to come on here and be negative, it’s only natural not a “negative Nancy” moment.? I seem to have the opposite problem.? I’m so negative and hard on myself, I wonder how much of that limits me as opposed to energize me?!?!?!? I think we both learned something this past week so although we didn’t make our goals for the week, we’re realizing the things that are KEEPING us from getting there.? Let’s try these changes for the coming week and see what happens okay?!?!? I’m here for you and look forward to your success.? I know it must be scary to see that number creeping back after so much hard work but you’re still here and you’re still trying and for TODAY….that’s what matters most because you’re exercising and staying OP.? Keep me posted.?
Kari, if you are feeling something negative let it fly, get it out there, so you can move on. It is a powerful thing to say ‘ I feel bad today ‘, not only is it cathartic for you, but it gives us the oppertunity to help. Don’t apologize for or downplay what you are feeling, own it. It’s in the suppression of our true emotions that we run into trouble.
The fact you’re able to acknowledge everything without letting it overwhelm you & create bad habits is all you really need.
It doesn’t matter if your tendency is to be too hard on yourself or too easy, the big thing is understanding that you can separate out your actions from your reactions.
Kari, You’re still doing great.? We all have our ups and downs (some of us more than others).? You should be proud of what you’ve accomplished so far.? Oh yeah!? They have this drink out now called V-Fusion.? Its really good.? It does have calories, but you also get in a serving of fruit and veggies per 8 oz servings.